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nosdrinker:

my english teacher accused me of plagiarizing an essay i wrote about my own life

claydols:

my eyes change colour depending on my swag levels. they are the darkest brown when my swag levels are at a maximum. i have never seen them change

yung-medusa:

cremedelamerde:

and people are concerned about Miley…

︻╦╤─ soft ghetto ─╤╦︻

yung-medusa:

cremedelamerde:

and people are concerned about Miley…

︻╦╤─ soft ghetto ─╤╦︻

boosmygod:

brotherentropy:

squeezemyrod:

semen has as much vitamin c in it as an orange

absolutely horrifying

so what you’re telling me is that sucking dick can prevent scurvy

this really sheds a whole new light on pirate lifestyles

effses:

HOW ANGRY DO YOU HAVE TO BE, THOUGH

reallylameblog:

ive never watched porn. i DID look at my own boobs once tho but i looked away really quickly because i dont want to go to hell

spookyvvaddles:

im laughing rly hard

spookyvvaddles:

im laughing rly hard

skarvika:

i wasn’t kidding when i said i got asked out by taylor swift once

skarvika:

i wasn’t kidding when i said i got asked out by taylor swift once

juilan:

Don’t fake an orgasm for a guy, let him know his dick game weak as hell